Pitching a FIT

FIT is a weird place. I don’t mean that it is a bad school or that I’m questioning my decision to come here—I mean that so far it has sort of been a bizarre ride to be a student here. My program continues to show solid evidence that it is high quality, will teach me a lot of interesting and practical things, and may in fact set me up with the right contacts to find a job. But everything outside my program (ie: everything not encompassed in floor 6 of building E) is fascinatingly strange. Clearly, a big part of it is the fact that I had a liberal arts undergrad education in Indiana, and this is a design school in the middle of New York City. All the buildings are tall, I have to wear my ID badge while wandering around, and “dance team” is one of the only varsity sports. But for some of this stuff, there is no excuse. If was Jerry Seinfeld, I would be saying, “Seriously. What is the deal with FIT?”

• Every student in my program has had some sort of frustration with various offices requiring paperwork. For me this started before I even got there. Remember when five days before I got accepted to the program, they e-mailed to say that they hadn’t received half my applications materials despite having confirmed their arrival months ago? That was fun. This week I spent just about every day calling or visiting health services to try and clear up an issue with my immunization forms. New York requires the form to have a doctor’s stamp, and Washington doctors don’t have stamps. They helpfully suggested that I could get all the shots again. I’ve been advised to “be a New Yorker” and yell at them until I get what I want. As a Seattleite I feel guilty doing it, but it does seem to magically solve problems and make missing papers re-appear.

• If you enjoy people watching, you should come hang out on campus. My pre-conceived notion about the undergrad population was that it would be a bunch of gay boys and artsy females previously known as the out-there individualist at their high school. Much like the delusional Project Runway contestant who is shocked to be eliminated for making a chicken suit, I imagined most of the students carrying that “the world isn’t ready for me” attitude that is adorably obnoxious coming from someone who is 19. To some degree that is true. I’ve seen a lot of “ironic” early 90s ensembles, heads shaved in unexpected places, and perplexing piercings. But there is another FIT type that I wasn’t expecting—the group frequently referred to as “those little FIT girls.” These specimens look like they very well might have been the most popular girls in high school. They are all super thin, have long straight hair, wear tiny cute outfits, are covered in makeup, and carry designer bags. I heard a rumor (92% likely to be an urban myth) that the cafeteria sprays the lettuce in the salad bar with cornstarch so that “all the anorexic girls will get some calories.” The other day I sat next to one that was particularly amazing. I saw this girl with lips that looked suspiciously collagen enhanced, staring off into space, with her mouth partially open as if she wasn’t totally clear on how to close it.

• Now onto my top issue with FIT: THERE ARE NO BATHROOMS AT THIS SCHOOL. As part of living in a civilized world, one expects that when in a tall building, if you ask “where is the bathroom?” the answer should be something resembling “down that hallway and to the right.” The answer should NOT be “oh gosh…let’s see…well I think…is there one on the third floor? Maybe…the 5^th?” I have been in two buildings (one with 6 floors, the other 8) where my inquiry regarding bathrooms has been met with confusion, and then the admission that my best bet is to go to the first floor. And the first floor bathrooms aren’t nice and large with rows of stalls. No, they usually have between two and four stalls, and are a mess because of all the heavy use. Come on, isn’t this America? Doesn’t the Statue of Liberty say “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning for a decent restroom?” If my ancestors wanted to travel long distances to wait in line for a smelly bathroom they would have stayed in Russia.