Imaginary Scenarios of Superiority

You know how there are some stores that seem intimidating to walk into? Places where you assume the staff will size you up and then proceed to glare at you until you leave? Have you ever though to yourself "what would happen if I sauntered into to the Versace section of Nordstrom and just started trying things on?"

While I haven't yet mustered the audacity to shop in a high-end designer store, I've found myself fantasizing about doing so, and stunning people with my fashion history knowledge if anyone gives me a hard time. I mean, I might wear sweaters covered in cat hair, but I'm a fashion librarian.

Here is how I imagine it playing out:

Snobby Shopper: Ugh. I guess they let anyone in the store these days. I bet that girl, like, doesn't even know who Dior is.

Me: Hi. Actually I do. Probably more than you do.

Snobby Shopper: I am like, so sure.

Me: So I suppose you know who he worked for before opening his couture house in 1947?

Snobby Shopper: ...

Me: The answer you are looking for is Robert Piguet and then Lucien Lelong.

Bystanders: Wow. Amazing.

Sales Staff: Let's give her free things.